A praying life.

Lately I have been reading through A Praying Life, by Paul Miller. The person who recommended it to me said it was the "best Christian book he had ever read," so - even though there too many unread books at my house that I should've chosen from - I was intrigued enough to check it out.

Miller is very honest and raw as he discusses the topic of prayer, which is so refreshing to someone who often feels defeated when it comes to praying. He writes,

"The most common frustration is the activity of praying itself. We last for about fifteen seconds, and then out of nowhere the day's to-do list pops up and our minds are off on a tangent. We catch ourselves and, by sheer force of the will, go back to praying. Before we know it, it has happened again. Instead of praying, we are doing a confused mix of wandering and worrying. Then the guilt sets in. Something must be wrong with me. Other Christians don't seem to have this trouble praying....Something is wrong with us."

Wow, do I ever relate to that.

A few pages later he goes on to say,

 "One of the subtlest hindrances to prayer is probably the most pervasive. In the broader culture and in our churches, we prize intellect, competency, and wealth. Because we can do life without God, praying seems nice but unnecessary. Money can do what prayer does, and it is quicker and less time-consuming. Our trust in ourselves and in our talents makes us structurally independent of God. As a result, exhortations to pray don't stick."

Pegged again.

On and on he goes, describing my (sinful, ugly, deceitful, and messy) heart when it comes to the issue of praying to the Father. And offering life-giving truth that reminds me and others that our loving God knows that. That's why he sent Jesus. Not so that I would get it right, but that so he could connect with me even though I get it all wrong. So that he could look upon me with love and forgiveness and grace and mercy even when I mess it all up. So that I could be face to face with him without receiving the wrath appropriate for my wretchedness. So that I could talk to Him.

"God cheers when we come to him with our wobbling, unsteady prayers. Jesus does not say, 'Come to me, all you who have learned how to concentrate in prayer, whose minds no longer wander, and I will give you rest.' No, Jesus opens his arms to his needy children and says, 'come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.' (Matt 11:28). The criteria for coming to Jesus is weariness. Come overwhelmed with life. Come with your wandering mind. Come messy."

                                                                  -Paul A. Miller, A Praying Life